If you’re feeling stuck after a breakup, divorce, life challenge or transition, you're not alone. In this blog post, I’ll share the #1 thing you should prioritize to heal, rebuild, and create a life you love again.

Why You Feel Stuck

When we face a big challenge, like a breakup or life transition, it’s easy to obsess over the problem. We replay events, analyze every detail, and fixate on things we can’t control. I’ve been there myself. After multiple painful breakups, I found myself consumed with thoughts about my ex and the circumstances of our relationship. I spent hours rehashing memories, wondering where things went wrong, and blaming myself or my ex. This cycle left me feeling lost, anxious, and depressed.

When you view the problem as external—“This person left me, so I feel this way”—you’re naturally tempted to search for external solutions. But that approach doesn’t work because the root of the problem lies within you.

It’s like treating the flu when the real issue is an inflamed cavity with flu-like symptoms—you’re addressing the symptoms, not the cause. Here’s an example. I worked with a man whose wife